Cry

Back when we were dating, Chad asked me straight up if I was a crier.  I think he wanted to know what he was getting himself into.  I honestly replied "no".  He asked me how many times I remember crying in my adult life.  I thought about it and gave a rediculously low estimate.  It was an honest attempt.  I really thought "crier" was not a description that fit me.  Later, during our first year of marriage, Chad called me out as a liar!  His estimate claimed that I cry about once a week.  I was shocked!  I think that his estimate is little over the top, but I now see that my mine was much too conservative.  Don't misjudge me.  I don't just lay around weaping tears of sorrow every day.  There are just some times when I get a little over emotional.  The emotions are varying.  Sometimes saddness, sometimes frustration, sometimes spiritual, sometimes anxiety, sometimes pity.  Come on, I am a woman with hormones, and I have a right to let it out if it makes me feel better! 

This may seem like a random topic, but it came to me today as I finished reading The Book Thief.  Book club is tonight and I hadn't finished the book yet.  And as luck would have it, forewarning signs of a migraine came this morning.  Luckily it has been mild and I was able to finish the book.  I only had a couple chapters left.  I bawled my eyes out!  It was just page after page of tears.  I kept thinking, "Oh geez.  Make it stop.  Make the saddness stop!"  This was not a few silent tears.  It was vocal, out loud, crying!  I thought to myself, "I am just emotional today because of the migraine."  I made up other excuses, like, "This is just a really sad book." Or, "I am just tired cause I haven't slept well all week (we have had the cold/flu of the century go through our house this week).  See... excuses.  Then I remembered last month's book club, and how I had cried then.  And the month before that.  And in comparison to The Book Thief, those were not even very sad books.  It is time for me just to admit....I am a crier.  It is who I am.  "Crier" is now a word that describes me. 

Side note: You should read The Book Thief.  The devistaing tears are worth it.  And I have not spoiled it for you.  You know from the first chapter that you will cry.  Its a given.  Read it, and afterward just give in and admit you are a crier too.